Review: Crepaway (Victoria Island, Lagos)
NOSA: The other day, we were at RSVP and we were talking between ourselves about how incredible it is that RSVP is still fully reserved five years after launch.
FOLLY: I had tried to get a table for dinner on the same day and all they had were the high tables.
NOSA: For a town as fickle as Lagos, that’s something to applaud. Now, this isn’t a review of RSVP but they’re noteworthy in this story because they pretty much kicked off this trend of American fast-casual fare (think Applebee’s or TGI Friday’s) you see at most restaurants in Lagos.
FOLLY: Erm, RSVP is New American and not fast-casual, far from fast-casual.
NOSA: Back then, by virtue of no competition, even the banalest of plates looked otherworldly and exciting. RSVP stepped it up as soon as it became obvious that all new openings were following the same template, but it doesn’t look like everyone got the memo. That’s how you end up with something like Crepaway.
Impressive decor. Check.
Well trained staff. Check.
Boring food. Check.
FOLLY: In summary, Crepaway is one of those restaurants that’s not memorable in any way aside of the building.
NOSA: Is it perfect for team bonding dinners? Absolutely. You’re expensing it so nobody is really looking out for the quality of the food here. It’s accessible and that all that matters. But you, dear EatDrinkLagos reader, are definitely not spending your own money here. Well, I hope you don’t.
FOLLY: I mean, you can. We’re not inside your wallet.
NOSA: Crepaway is a big franchise in Lebanon according to the Google and rumour has it that the owner of the property saw how successful the franchise is in Lebanon that he felt it necessary to force Casper & Gambini out to the next building. That’s the gist we heard, oh.
FOLLY: The menu is one of those multi-page ones where you know they can’t be good at everything.
NOSA: We keep saying it, but no one restaurant’s good at that many things. We’ve been doing this for 5/6 years and we haven’t stumbled on a restaurant in Lagos that’s been able to pull it off.
FOLLY: If your food menu exceeds four pages for your starters, mains, and desserts then I’m confident that you cannot be good at all of those things.
NOSA: We started with the Kim Chick Fries, a Korean-inspired take on loaded fries. Maybe we should’ve gone with the quesadillas instead because these types of restaurants always have nice quesadillas. The buyer’s remorse set in as soon as they brought the plate to our table.
FOLLY: Honestly, I would have settled for the chicken tenders because I didn’t really have faith in the Kim Chick fries. However, Nosa said we should order one of the signature dishes so I said sure.
NOSA: Tastewise, it’s not the worst thing I’ve had. It’s definitely better than the nonsense at The Metaphor, that’s for sure. The Bang Bang sauce is something I’d love to have bottled also. Unfortunately, that’s all the good things I can say. The chicken was dry and tasteless. For N4500, it’s such a forgettable appetizer.
FOLLY: Honestly, it’s so unmemorable that even though I have notes from the experience I can’t even remember it.
NOSA: For our mains, we got the Deep Sea Baby and the Italian Job Burger.
NOSA: The Deep Sea Baby is a fish fillet served with vegetables, mashed potatoes and the most delicious pesto sauce. But as you can see from the picture, it was the most pitiful thing we ordered.
FOLLY: The plating of this didn’t bring me joy, I don’t get why they sent out a plate that looks so uninspiring.
NOSA: That’s what Folly gets for trying to be healthier than me.
FOLLY: The fish was largely bland as were the vegetables but thankfully neither was overcooked. I remember a Twitter thread that was viral earlier this month about seasoning your vegetables especially your salad, I would like to cc Crepaway on that thread.
While Nosa had high praise for the pesto sauce, I couldn’t just pour it all over my fish and use that to add flavour because of my intolerances but I think that must have been what they were going for. The garlic smashed potatoes were the only decent thing on the plate but it’s definitely not a good thing for the side to steal the show.
NOSA: It wasn’t any better for me because I didn’t like my burger either. There was way too much bun and that’s always a quick way to tell that a burger won’t be worth shit. This was the most vanilla chicken burger/sandwich I’ve had in Lagos and I’ve had the Chicken Republic burger a couple of times.
The burger fell apart easily, but it didn’t fall apart in the same way nice burgers do. It fell apart like the even the elements of the burger didn’t want to be there either and I don’t blame them because I ate half of it and gave up.
FOLLY: I insisted on getting a crepe even though everything hadn’t gone so well so far cause I was certain they’d be better at the thing after which they were named.
I was wrong.
NOSA: The crepe was so tough that we needed a steak knife to cut through. Ok, I exaggerate a little.
FOLLY: Yeah, that part is a lie but the crepes were incredibly rubbery. From making pancakes, I know two things could cause crepes to be rubbery - too much flour or cooking too slow. Considering how bad these were, I’d say it was a combination of the two.
NOSA: Just like the burger, it didn’t get much eating done to it. Neither of us was about to waste our calorie allocation to this.
POSTSCRIPT
FOLLY: Very mid. The pictures of the food look way better than they actually taste.
VERDICT
DAMAGE
Kim Chick Fries - N4500
Italian Job Burger - N4300
Deep Sea Baby - N6500
Magali Crepe - N2800
PRICE RANGE
N2500 - N10500
PARKING
6 or 7 spots