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The House Wins With Originality

The House

4 A.J. Marinho Dr, Victoria Island, Lagos

0908 291 9773

NOSA: The House is lits a house. I'd heard a lot about the themed rooms, but I didn't think it was that "deep". Nope, I was wrong. It is that "deep" and each room/section in The House has its own vibe, which is a good thing and bad thing. Good, because it's one of the most "original" spots in Lagos. Bad, because it's not really functional. It's great if you're here for drinks after work, but they have a full kitchen and the vibe doesn't lend itself to a pleasant dining experience. We found ourselves moving from table to table before finally getting comfortable in the garden.

FOLLY: Our visit to The House was a little exhausting. This is because I believe someone who was there told one of the owners who we were and so he proceeded to check in on us periodically in a manner that was a little overbearing. 

NOSA: On a related note, it's a bit weird + annoying + awkward when people see you out eating and ask, "are you reviewing this one?". It's just cringe for everyone involved. 

FOLLY: If you know me IRL, please stop doing it. Christina had already reviewed the drinks at The House in her Drink Lagos post from a couple weeks ago so I skipped the drinks menu and went straight for the food. 

NOSA: Oh, a little fun fact: Afrolems curated the menu at The House

FOLLY: I hadn’t been feeling too well on this day so I was a bit conservative with my ordering. While Nosa had the Cheesy Yam Balls for his starter, I decided to keep it simple with the Honey Garlic Chicken Wings

You know that bitterness that local honey has to it because it’s more natural and all? That came through in this while the garlic was noticeably mute.

NOSA: More honey wings than honey garlic wings, if you ask me. Wayyyy too sweet for me. The chicken itself was well made, neither undercooked nor CrossFit tough, but it just wasn't for me on the whole. 

The yam balls were more my speed, which makes sense because I ordered it. Think pounded yam stuffed with mozzarella and battered. If I was the chef, I'd have gone with a sharper cheese. One of the saltier ones like cheddar or Gruyère. In the yam balls, the cheese is definitely "stringy cheesy", but it doesn't add much to the whole thing. 

FOLLY: I couldn’t really identify anything that I wanted from the list of main items on the menu so I again went back to the starter menu to pick something to go with a side. 

NOSA: Snails & Garlic Bread and a side of Kelewele is what Folly eventually went with.

FOLLY: After we posted the picture of the snails on our Instagram, a follower noted that this item was "10% snail and 90% pepper”. She is right. There’s a certain level of pepper that makes a dish intolerable, the amount of pepper in this reached and surpassed that. Thankfully, the garlic bread did a great job of calming my fiery tongue and active sweat glands - spicy food makes my forehead and nose sweat buckets.

NOSA: Unlike Folly, I thoroughly enjoyed my main. I got the House Fried Chicken, which comes with a side of cornbread. The chicken was pretty good, which is a given with Nigerian-run kitchens these days. It's our international friends that no too sabi the work. 

FOLLY: I take FULL responsibility for this one because I didn’t know the enter premise of the Kelewele was the fact that it was SPICY. I was already battling with the snails so I just had to abandon the Kelewele because I couldn’t come and kill myself and die. I should just have kept it simple with chips or something. 

NOSA: The cornbread had actual sweet corn in it, which was a bit too weird for me. Like, I get it's a savory thing, but actual sweet corn in cornbread is a bit OTT. 

FOLLY: Nosa had really wanted us to order the puff-puff tower but we got distracted by a heated game of Scrabble. I love that The House has board games lying around so that you can entertain yourself while dining at their space - love it. 

NOSA: What I didn't love was the flies though.

POSTSCRIPT

NOSA: I'd defintely come back here. Might be my favorite new opening this year after the Grill by Delis.

VERDICT

DAMAGE

Kelewele - N1500

Cheesy Yam Balls - N3000

Snails & Garlic Bread - N4500

The House Fried Chicken - N5200

Honey Garlic Chicken Wings - N4000

PARKING

When they are busy, it's double parking mess.