5 Things You Shouldn't Order on a First Date

NOSA: Today's post was inspired by the girls at WJGB, aka Bad Gang. If you're not hip, it's not too late. Their latest podcast is about difficulties of dating in Lagos.

Listen this week as King Cam, Boj and Tam talk about dating/going out in Lagos. Spoiler Alert: There's really not that many places to go. More Spoiler Alert: At some point, we talk about monkey AIDS. Because, us.

So it got me thinking and stuff. What are things you should absolutely not order on a first date. 

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Indian Food

NOSA: Indian is one big poop waiting to happen. I know it's delicious and all, but it's your first date. You guys don't know each other like that. Indian food is a real intimate experience, you can't go around sharing that with anybody.

Burgers & Ribs

FOLLY: Please don't be the babe that eats her burger with a fork and knife, and you also don't want to pick it up cause the mayo-ketchup etc. will drip down your fingers, and then you run the chance of looking messy as you're reaching for multiple paper napkins.

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If you must eat a burger that day just drive by Urban Fuxion on the way home and pretend like your brother sent you a text to bring it home for him. 

Anything Spicy

NOSA: Suya. Asun. Spicy Shawarma.

Avoid. Avoid. Avoid. 

Especially if there's a chance you might do the nasty afterwards. 

FOLLY: What does spicy food have to do with that though?

NOSA: Because...actually, just do it and you'll find out

Chicken*

NOSA: If it isn't boneless, stay away from chicken on first dates. In fact, you shouldn't be eating chicken in any public place in Nigeria. Because,

1. It's either a crossfit chicken because Nigerian chickens stay in the gym
2. You'll never get to enjoy your chicken. Like, enjoy

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FOLLY: I disagree on this one. You can order chicken as long as you use a fork and knife. Stay away from chicken wings though cause there's no way to eat those without using your hands. 

NOSA: Fork and knife will never give you the satisfaction of using your hands

Spaghetti

NOSA: If you're going with pasta, avoid spaghetti. Penne is your best friend because you probably don't have the spaghetti tekkers. Nobody wants to hear you slurp your way through the plate. 

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FOLLY: Yes, I've definitely thought about this one before because of the slurping and the potential for it to mess with my lipstick. I always go for pasta shapes that I can eat whole.